i'm done with mice in children's literature. from now on i'll read 'goodnight house, goodnight mouse, you WILL be dead soon so your filthy excrement cannot poison my family, goodnight lazy kittens b/c you're good for nothing and if you were doing your job i wouldn't be the one trying to kill the mouse. goodnight old lady b/c you're gone too. what woman in their right mind would sit there and knit while a mouse no matter how little was rampant in her child's room leaving poisonous droppings everywhere.' i don't care how old you are old lady whispering hush, if there is a mouse you take one of those needles and do something jackie chan with it. maybe if you didn't leave bowls full of mush around we wouldn't have this problem.
in light of these musings, 2am last night i look around the room and see something move on the wall next to the night light which i might add is right next to the closet. okay, shelob, it's on. you've spun your last. i'm not little miss muffet and i will not be frightened away. carrying my sleeping daughter i strike w/ the burp cloth but all i've managed to do is knock the eight legged monster on the floor. in full panic mode i do what any mother would do. i strike with my bare feet (it was dark and my arms were carrying a sack of potatoes haling away at her z's). i bend over to find the grease spot remnant of my enemy (which wakes up pen) and there is nothing. WHAT, i may be a short person but i really don't understand how my size 8's could miss this thing. lights on, pen changed and wide awake in her crib, i continue my search. i don't get it, you must be dead and if not i WILL kill you. i will not let you hide in stinkerbell's dresses to bite and torture her on a sunday morning. i have no reason to let you live oh you result of the fall of man.
on the floor doing a horizontal glance across the hard wood i see my once proud enemy and i smile in glorious victory. children's literature should never mess with greek heroines.
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